30 Days of Kink

Day 14: How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?

The fantasy is The Story of O, where O trusts Rene with her life.  The reality is I have trust issues, and while I’ll spend my entire life working on them, it’s a very big fucking deal for me to trust my lover (whoever he is) to order for me at dinner and get that right.

The fantasy is Lolita, the reality is I worry that at 38 years old I’m too goddamn old to be a Middle/Lolita/Nymph.  Do I have to be a milf just because I’m old enough to be considered one? That role doesn’t suit me.

The fantasy is you go to the black sheet party and you just fuck someone with reckless abandon.  The reality is safe sex and testing for STDs and there’s that one guy at the black sheet party who everybody knows he has herpes and doesn’t use any protection, but nobody can stop him from showing up to those parties.

The fantasy is that I, as a submissive female, am on my knees 24/7/365, that I only open my mouth for a man’s sexual gratification.  The reality is I open my mouth to let opinions out, to say what I want or don’t want.  The reality is I have a very comfortable sofa, and I spend more time reclining on it than I do kneeling (but NOT enough time bent over the arm of it).

The fantasy is that every Dominant man is Christian Grey, a handsome rich guy with his own personal Red Room of Pain. The reality is some Dominant men wear jeans that fit them like a second skin, others wear assless leather chaps, and some have on a polo shirt and Dockers.

The fantasy is that I’m always a visually stunning creature.  The reality is I don’t have my hair and makeup done at 8 am when I step outside my door to smoke a cigarette and get the paper, I’m usually in a chemise and an old men’s dress shirt I call “my summer robe”, wearing flip-flops, no makeup, and hair that looks like there may be a raccoon nesting in it.

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